Special Episode!!! M, a member of a foster family, says there are not enough resources to prepare children to welcome new foster siblings into their home. She shares advice, drawn from her own experiences and other children in foster families.
M’s Suggestions
M is a pre-teen whose family has been fostering for over 5 years. She wishes more resources were available to prepare children to welcome new foster siblings into their home. She, along with a couple friends, share their experiences on being a foster family and advice for others new to this exciting journey.
Advice for Kids
- Life will be different – just like with any new sibling. Don’t spend time worrying about it – it will be different, and everyone will figure it out as you go along.
- Also, just like with any new sibling (or friend) there will be times that you probably annoy each other. Try to overlook this and remember the big moments and happy times.
- The goal of foster care is to find the best home for kids – and this might not be your home. Saying goodbye can and will be sad. You might actually feel a lot of things when you say goodbye, and that is okay.
- Finally, and most importantly, don’t worry about what other people think. They likely won’t think anything other than “cool” anyway, but no matter what other people are not a part of your family. So, don’t worry about it. It will not be a big deal to anyone else. The most important thing is to focus on your family.
Advice for Parents
M says that her parents helped her a lot, and so she wanted to share what she liked best about how they helped her prepare to become a foster family.
- Help your children feel involved. Let them help pick out items for the foster children’s room. Maybe give your child a special role or responsibility – like putting them in charge of explaining some family rules, or introducing the pets.
- Communicate. Keep your children involved in the process. Let them know about important things happening in the case. It is better to know what is going on so you can deal with difficult things.
Foster Care Resources:
Children’s Bureau: Federal Government site dedicated to improving the lives of children and families through multiple programs, including foster care.
Together We Rise: Non-profit focused on improving the lives of children in foster care.
Adopt US Kids: Resource rich site including foster care resources by state, personal stories, and a registry of children waiting for adoption.
Adventures in Saying Yes (Gina Sampaio / The Moth Storytelling): Loving and humorous story about transracial adoption through foster care.
